have i lost myself?

who am i?

a Christian - I love my Lord - my savior, redeemer, friend, abba - father, alpha & omega, mercy, forgiveness, never leaves me, my comfort, my joy, ever present help in time of trouble, light house, knows my future, new me before i was formed, loves me, desires a relationship w/ me, all consuming fire, patient, kind, loving, beautiful, knows who i am and loves me anyway, my all in all, thinks aobut me all day and all night. i'm always on His mind.

sports- do i really like them as much as i let on? well, up until this year not so much. in 8th grade i watched the Lakers and the Celtics play during a championship playoff thing. in high school i was in the band so i had to go to the football games. which i really enjoyed doing - particularly when Dan S. was playing - but didn't pay too much attention. college, well now that's a different story....baseball groupie oh yes i was one during my soph and jr year! basketball, for a season my senior year. then some long haired cutie came and swept me off my feet and he was into magic/illusions stuff so, sports see ya later. my sister attended TAMU but not once did i ever go to a game w/ her. don't think she ever went to one either - correct me connie if i'm wrong. well, actually one time me and Brian were on our way to an Aggie game w/ Connie and some of Brian's Buckner friends but i hydraplaned and wrecked my car on the way so we didn't make it. but this year has been different. i've given into watching UFC and football. crazy. i'm actually interested in these two things. on side kick roughing the kicker arm bar, choke hold, matt hughes, hester, flynn, tito ortez....i can tell ya what that stuff is and who they are! weird

snow skiing - i hate being cold but i really like to ski. i must be covered from head to toe. getting irritated if one part of my body is getting cold while i'm making it down a run. even if my wrists are cold i have to fix it.

water - LOVE IT! in or near it i don't care. lake ...ocean just get me there.

paintball - nope - never will i be apart of this sport...whatever you call it. read me loud and clear NEVER NO NEVER! anything that brings pain and leaves half dollar sized bloody whelps ....this girl will NOT be apart of. now if mattie or ryder feel so inclined to be apart of it - whatever go for it. but ask me to name parts of a paintball gun and i bet ya i'd get it right. too many late nights watching Brian clean his guns.

TV - love watching it. spend hours doing it. spend hours wasting my time when there are floors to be swept, dishes to be put away, clothes to be washed....a precious little girl and boy i should be playing w/.
in my defense....this saturday i spent the day playing w/ them and watching whatever Mattie wanted to watch. i even took a nap when Ryder took his. we got out the train set, hot wheels, and play dough - it was a really nice Saturday. Brian was at the church preparing his sermon so he didn't get to play but he was there in spirit:)

teaching - i really loved teaching and hope to get to do it in the future. guilt runs through my veins like ice water b/c i'm working when i should be at home w/ Ryder. i always said i wasn't going to work until the kids were back in school but things change. i love my job. it's easy and i get to see Brian everyday and help him. but one day i will return to teaching if that's where the Lord wants me.

Brian asked me one day what i enjoy doing...a hobbie....and i honestly couldn't name one. besides being w/ him and my family. i guess they are my hobbie. and i guess the Lord's in there somewhere:) of course he's my favoritest hobby. people please know i'm being funny.

i just thought of one - I LOVE CREATING THIS BLOG. it's an outlet for me...just me. and though it seems there's a lot of brian and mattie and ryder....well, hey they're my world so of course your gonna hear about them. but there's apart of me here too.

so in answering my own ?...no i haven't lost myself...i was never lost to begin with.